Leaning Forward

I recently had the opportunity to go snowboarding with some friends a couple of weekends ago in Michigan.  I had been several times before, but never quite grasped how to go down the hill fast.  Every time I started to pick up speed, I would start to lean back on my back foot.  This would cause the edge of my board to catch the snow and I would take a nasty spill.  Eventually, one of my friends who went that day and who was quite good at snowboarding, gave me some advice that really changed my approach to carving down the slopes.  He told me the key for going fast down the hill and not allowing my snowboard edge to catch the snow was to lean forward onto my front foot.  This new advice was very intimidating to implement at first because of how much speed I generated in such a short amount of time.  To my amazement, leaning forward and trusting the board to guide me down the hill worked.  As I took pressure off my back foot and leaned forward, the back edges of my board were loose enough on top of the snow to keep the board from digging into the snow.  In turn, the board went straight down the hill.  The key was for me to trust the board to do its job as I leaned forward into an uncomfortable position. 

Our relationship with God is a lot like this snowboarding experience.  God so many times wants us to lean forward and trust Him and lean on Him for direction, guidance and council and when things don’t make sense to us, we need to trust that He sees the bigger picture.  Our carnal minds want answers and we want them “NOW”.  When we don’t get the answer we are looking for, we sometimes take things into our own hands.  

Romans 8:6 (Amplified Bible)

Now the mind of the flesh [which is sense and reason without the Holy Spirit] is death [death that comprises all the miseries arising from sin, both here and hereafter]. But the mind of the [Holy] Spirit is life and [soul] peace [both now and forever].

This verse is simply stating that without the illumination from the Holy Spirit we will miss what God is trying to teach us or where He wants to lead us.  We need to trust God and let His peace guard our hearts and minds.  Sometimes God leads us into very uncomfortable situations because He is trying to train us so that we can be fully mature believers.  

Take Job for example.  Behind the scenes, God had a conversation with Satan about Job and God allowed Satan to bring difficulty into his life.  Job lost everything he owned and all his sons and daughters were killed in one day!!!  Then, if that wasn’t enough, Job was stricken with sores from the top of his head to the soles of his feet for an extended amount of time.  Eventually some of Job’s friends heard about all the trials Job had faced and came to comfort him.  They told Job that he must be in sin, because a righteous person wouldn’t go through such trials. 

It’s amazing to me how many critics we have when we are down in the lowest points of our lives.  When we need someone to encourage us, we get blasted with judgmental stares and opinions.  Many of them even claim to be speaking on behalf of God.  I had such an experience.  At the start of the economic downturn a little over 2 years ago, I was working in Atlanta, GA for a very successful landscape architecture firm.  Everyone at the office was given a pay cut and eventually several people were laid off, one of which was me.  It was very difficult to find a job during this time and especially one in my field.  About 75% of the landscape architecture/ architecture industry was wiped out and was not returning any time soon.  Every job I took ended in me being laid off or forced to leave due to bad economic times and employers couldn’t afford to keep me on staff.  It was very confusing.  At the same time, I owned a house and rented rooms to some of my friends and they started struggling financially.  It was hard for them to pay me rent on time and some could only make partial payments.  For the first time ever, I started being late on bills and had to live off credit to survive.  None of it made sense to me.  I loved God and was trying to obey Him to the best of my ability and I tried to listen to financial experts about what to do.  Every good sound decision I made ended up spiraling me further into debt and despair.  Several of my friends began to question every aspect of my financial condition.  One of them even asked “Are you in sin?”  I was thinking in my head, “no, but I will be in five seconds if you don’t get away from me.”  I don’t think people have much compassion for others and where they have been, unless they have personally walked a mile in their shoes.  My own financial collapse has taught me to not be so quick to point the finger and judge anymore.  I am sad to admit that I used to be one of those critics!!  I can honestly say that God has completely changed my perspective and I am so grateful for the hard times.  They teach me to have God’s heart.  During this time, I was really discouraged about the whole ordeal and one night I cried out to God and asked Him, “Please show me if I am doing something wrong.  Help me trust you when I don’t see what you are doing.”  The next morning I was reading a book and it talked about how God had taken Job through a very difficult season that he didn’t understand why.  Then I read this verse in Job:

            Job 23:8-10 (Amplified Bible)

Behold, I go forward [and to the east], but He is not there; I go backward [and to the west], but I cannot perceive Him; on the left hand [and to the north] where He works [I seek Him], but I cannot behold Him; He turns Himself to the right hand [and to the south], but I cannot see Him.  But He knows the way that I take [He has concern for it, appreciates, and pays attention to it]. When He has tried me, I shall come forth as refined gold [pure and luminous].

Through this verse, God was asking me to trust Him when life didn’t make sense and to leave the critics in His hands.  I don’t have to try and convince people why I am going through these trials, but I need to lean forward on God and let Him teach me the lessons He wants me to learn, even when it is uncomfortable.  Then, I will come forth as pure gold with no defects. 

My financial condition worsened.  I ended up losing everything: my car, my house, all my household belongings and I eventually had to declare bankruptcy.  On top of that, I had to move back in with my parents and be dependent on them for the first time in almost 11 years…very humbling.  I made up my mind, I was not going to try and figure it out.   The bible says in Proverbs 3:5-6 (Amplified Bible) Lean on, trust in, and be confident in the Lord with all your heart and mind and do not rely on your own insight or understanding.  In all your ways know, recognize, and acknowledge Him, and He will direct and make straight and plain your paths. 

It’s interesting that in the depths of my financial despair, God placed on my heart to write about all the difficult experiences He allowed me to walk through over the last 11 years.  It had always been a dream of mine to help encourage others in the midst of life’s challenges and I saw myself one day communicating these truths through writing.  God used what seemed to be a tragic season in my life to steer me in a totally new direction…a God direction.  Just this past week, someone in South Florida read my blog and asked me to become a writer for a Christian newspaper.  Had I not gone through all these challenges, I would not have been in a place where I had the time or energy to write.  God’s ways are truly not our ways. 

God knows what He is doing in your life!  Will you lean forward and trust God in the midst of uncertain times?  He is the only one who can see beyond your troubles and guide you to a safe place.  Don’t be afraid to place your complete trust and confidence in God and allow Him to direct your steps.  

Lean Forward…Lean on God. 

Let Go

Have you ever wanted something so bad that it consumed your every thought?  Sure, we all have.  Sometimes it might be a really good thing and other times it can actually be something that can bring real harm into our lives.  Let’s look at Abraham’s life as an example.  

Genesis 15:2-5 (Amplified Bible)  And Abram said, Lord God, what can You give me, since I am going on [from this world] childless and he who shall be the owner and heir of my house is this [steward] Eliezer of Damascus?  And Abram continued, Look, You have given me no child; and [a servant] born in my house is my heir. 

And behold, the word of the Lord came to him, saying, This man shall not be your heir, but he who shall come from your own body shall be your heir.  And He brought him outside [his tent into the starlight] and said, Look now toward the heavens and count the stars--if you are able to number them. Then He said to him, So shall your descendants be. 

Abraham waited years for the dream God promised him to come to pass and after much patience, Isaac was born.   It was a joyous celebration and a real step of faith and trust in God because Abraham learned to trust God to bring to pass the very desires in his heart.   Abraham grew fond of his son and cherished every moment with him.  Then one day God asked Abraham to sacrifice his only son, the one God promised to make into many descendants.  It’s amazing to see that Abraham responded in obedience to what God asked him to do. 

            Genesis 22:12, 15-18 (Amplified Bible)

And He said, “Do not lay your hand on the lad or do anything to him; for now I know that you fear and revere God, since you have not held back from Me or begrudged giving Me your son, your only son.”

The Angel of the Lord called to Abraham from heaven a second time And said, I have sworn by Myself, says the Lord, that since you have done this and have not withheld [from Me] or begrudged [giving Me] your son, your only son, In blessing I will bless you and in multiplying I will multiply your descendants like the stars of the heavens and like the sand on the seashore. And your Seed (Heir) will possess the gate of His enemies, And in your Seed [Christ] shall all the nations of the earth be blessed and [by Him] bless themselves, because you have heard and obeyed My voice.

  

Abraham had to “Let Go” of the very thing that was so important to him and trust that God would bring it back into his life if it was good for him.  Abraham had no way of really knowing whether or not he would ever see his son again.  But He trusted in the One who could save his son and raise him back to life, if need be, and ultimately carry on his lineage.   

The bible says in Psalm 84:11 (NIV) For the LORD God is a sun and shield; the LORD bestows favor and honor; no good thing does he withhold from those whose walk is blameless.  This means that God has our best interest at heart and will bring into our lives the things that will be good for us and keep the things out of our lives that will ultimately harm us if we allow Him to lead us.  Sometimes, we think we need something so badly to be happy or satisfied that we override God’s leading and push forward to get our way.  The bible says in Proverbs 14:12, there is a way that appears to be right, but in the end it leads to death.  How many people push forward with a relationship that ends up being very destructive because they overlook the Holy Spirits leading or godly council in their lives?  Or, they push and claw to be in relationship with their boss, not because they value him, but because they want something from him…promotion.  We seek so many things, but are our motives pure in God’s eyes?  There is nothing wrong with asking God for something, but we need to be okay with God saying “NO” or “Not Yet”.  His ways are higher than our ways and He can see into the future and knows what can eventually harm us if we get our way all the time.  So, what am I saying?  We, as children of God need to be confident in asking God for desires that are in our heart, but let Him dictate what is best for us.  Don’t hold so tightly to something that you can’t let go and trust God to bring it into our lives if it is something that will benefit us.  Are you struggling to “Let Go” of a situation and place it completely in the hands of God?  Maybe you are trying to get a job and you are being overly demanding of a business or a loved one who is trying to help you.  When in actuality, God is saying trust me that my timing is perfect.  Or maybe you have unhealthy friendships because they are influencing you in a negative way that will take you away from God instead of closer to Him.  And God is saying to you…let them go and trust Me.  Our job is to trust God that He knows best.  Just as Abraham had to give God the dreams in his heart, God requires that of you and me.  I have found that when I give God everything, I have peace knowing that the God of the universe has my best interest at heart and loves to give amazing gifts to me.  If He doesn’t want me to have something, then as an act of faith, I just trust Him, even if my flesh is screaming to have its way!  Will you trust God today?  Will you just let go?  If you find yourself struggling in this area, ask God to help you give Him all the desires and dreams of your heart.  He is full of mercy and wants to embrace you and forgive you of past mistakes.  You can let go with God’s help.  

Where Are You Placing Your Trust?

In John 4 we find Jesus sitting at a well.  The passage says that it was necessary for Jesus to go through the region called Samaria to meet a Samaritan woman.  Jesus asked the woman for a drink of water because he had been on a journey and was passing through the town called Sychar.  In John 4:9  The Samaritan woman said to Him, How is it that You, being a Jew, ask me, a Samaritan [and a] woman, for a drink?--For the Jews have nothing to do with the Samaritans--

It was obvious from this passage that Jewish society looked down upon Samaritans and considered them outcasts and to some extent devalued women.  It’s interesting that Jesus lead by the Holy Spirit began talking with this woman even though his ethnic back ground discouraged it!  God cares about the broken, the wounded, the outcasts and He doesn’t discriminate anyone based on the color of their skin, nationality, male or female, or whether a person is rich or poor.  He draws near to anyone who is searching for the Truth. 

John 4:10-14  Jesus answered her, If you had only known and had recognized God's gift and Who this is that is saying to you, Give Me a drink, you would have asked Him [instead] and He would have given you living water.  She said to Him, Sir, You have nothing to draw with [no drawing bucket] and the well is deep; how then can You provide living water? [Where do You get Your living water?  Are You greater than and superior to our ancestor Jacob, who gave us this well and who used to drink from it himself, and his sons and his cattle also?  Jesus answered her, All who drink of this water will be thirsty again. But whoever takes a drink of the water that I will give him shall never, no never, be thirsty any more. But the water that I will give him shall become a spring of water welling up (flowing, bubbling) [continually] within him unto (into, for) eternal life.

Jesus used this analogy of water to communicate a huge truth this woman was missing.  He was basically saying to her if you understood who was asking you for a drink of water, you would have ask Me instead for living water and I would give it to you because Jesus discerned this woman’s past and saw where she was trying to find happiness. 

The passage continues…

John 4:16-18  At this, Jesus said to her, Go, call your husband and come back here.  The woman answered, I have no husband. Jesus said to her, you have spoken truly in saying, I have no husband.  For you have had five husbands, and the man you are now living with is not your husband. In this you have spoken truly.

Jesus was helping her understand where she was placing her trust.  This woman had been in 5 marriages and she was living with another man trying to find fulfillment in all the wrong places.  She was looking to men to find acceptance, love, security, value and hope because of a deep void in her heart.  However, only God could fill this hole.  Jesus said that He was the Living Water and if she drank of Him she wouldn’t thirst anymore.  In other words, she wouldn’t have to keep looking for more men to make her happy or fulfilled.  Jesus was saying that only God can truly satisfy the human heart and fill it where it overflows with life and peace.  Notice that Jesus never condemned her for her mistakes or her current sinful condition.  He just said come and drink of Me and I will cause your life to be transformed and give you what you really are looking for.  

Just as this woman came to Jesus as she was, God wants us to come to Him just as we are.  He is the Great Physician and can make us well and whole! 

How many of us are trying to find acceptance or our identity in a relationship, a career, a title, or our looks.  We jump from one relationship to the next, one job after another, and when we get it, we realize it doesn’t fill the void in our hearts just the way we thought it would.    Just as the woman was trying to find her identity in men, are you trying to find yours in things or a relationship? 

Only God has the ability to fill the deepest parts of your heart and give you the love and acceptance you are looking for.  God doesn’t condemn you for your past mistakes, just as He didn’t the woman at the well.  But He is asking you to place your trust and confidence in Him.  As you begin to lean your complete trust on Him, He will forgive you of your past and bring healing to those areas of hurt and pain and will give you an amazing future filled with excitement.  The woman at the well discovered the Creator of all things and experienced His unconditional love and acceptance.  Just think of how she could have a healthy relationship because she was truly experiencing God’s love and forgiveness and now she would be able to extend it to someone else.  Instead of being a taker in the relationship, she actually could be a giver because she experienced love from God.  She was able to pour out and bless someone else!  

Are you a taker in life?  Are you looking for love in all the wrong places?  Are you struggling with your journey and getting frustrated with the results?  Lean into God and He will embrace you and shower you with His love!  He will teach you how to overcome the storms in your life and give you the strength to move forward each day.   As you take steps of trust in God, out of you will flow streams of living water. 

Be Thankful In All Things – It Can Be A Blessing In Disguise

The holidays can be a great joy for many people. Families get together to eat and open gifts, watch a movie or just spend quality time with one another. Thanksgiving Day is always a favorite time of mine because I get to sit down and watch NFL football with my extended family. No one has to say anything. Just being in their company is such a joy! Unfortunately, the holidays can be a very negative experience for many people as well. These times can bring back negative emotions of unresolved conflict or broken relationships between family members or friends. Instead of a sense of joy and a thankful heart, an undercurrent of strife brews as extended family enters town. One can only hope there will be peace for the holidays!

I am quite familiar with strife and negative people. A couple of years ago, I worked for a company that had about 30 employees and one of them was extremely negative. He would tear himself and others down constantly. He had a hard time finding anything good to say and was quick to speak negatively about someone else in the office in order to make himself look good. It was hard to be around him. To make matters worse, he began to single me out from the crowd and say offensive things to me and would talk about me behind my back. When I entered the room where he was working, I could sense a bad vibe that I was not welcome in his area. Needless to say, it made work miserable for me. I couldn’t take it any longer. As a Christian, I knew God wanted me to treat him with respect, but it was so hard, especially after months and months of it. One day I prayed to God about the situation and asked Him to either get this person fired or cause him to come into a personal relationship with Jesus. I knew that Jesus could help heal his broken soul if he was willing to turn to God. A week went by and I had to stay late after work one night to finish a project. Everyone had left except the guy who tormented me day after day. All of a sudden he came up to my desk and asked if I was a youth pastor. I said, no, but I do work with the youth of my church and I also lead my church’s college and post college young adults program. He asked me, “Do you find most young people leave their faith after high school? I responded by explaining how God took me through a really dark doubting season of my life and brought me through it to eventually strengthen my faith in God. I also shared with him many difficult things I went through growing up and struggles that God has helped me overcome. He stood amazed at what he was hearing. He couldn’t believe that I had faced all these challenges and struggles. He thought I was this little “goody two shoes” that has never made mistakes or been through any rough patches in life. He said, “the truth is Cory I have been jealous of you because you have so much joy and peace in life and I want what you have!” I explained further, “My joy comes from knowing God through Jesus Christ and experiencing His unconditional love toward me just as I am. I don’t have to strive and try to be good. As I lean on Him, He changes me little by little.” I asked if he wanted to receive Jesus and place his trust in Him so that He could begin to experience the same kind of peace and joy! He wasn’t ready for that step, but from that day forward, he has treated me completely different. He has such a respect for me now and life around the office was quite different. I was so grateful to God that He intervened.

The bible says in 1 Thessalonians 5:18, Thank [God] in everything [no matter what the circumstances may be, be thankful and give thanks], for this is the will of God for you [who are] in Christ Jesus [the Revealer and Mediator of that will].

I had to learn to be THANKFUL in the midst of a very uncomfortable season. There were days I wanted to rip his head off or make a big scene at work! There were days I wanted to stay inward focused and not be out going because of the situation at hand. God took me through this trial to teach me to cast my cares on Him and through prayer and trusting Him, He would work on my behalf at just the right time.

The bible says in Romans 12:19, Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord.

The bible also teaches us to pray for our enemies. If we will take the people in our lives that are trying to hurt us to God and allow Him to work in the situation, we will see God do miracles on our behalf. I was amazed at how quickly the situation turned around as I gave it to Him. Just think, this person is way closer to accepting Jesus as his Savior and Lord because I allowed God to work on my behalf. His perception of God was skewed probably due to past church or family experiences and it had left some major hurts in his life. God in His great wisdom revealed glimpses of His true nature to my coworker as I was available and willing to go through all the difficult circumstances and rely on God’s strength and direction. What an amazing testimony of God’s goodness. After this season ended, I looked back and was so thankful for it. My coworker’s life was forever changed and he had taken huge steps forward in knowing God personally. I remember saying to myself, “I would go through the pain all over again to see him being transformed and for the nuggets of Truth I learned.”

I want to encourage you to trust and lean on God if you are in relationship with unpleasant people or will be around them during this holiday season. The trial you are facing can bring great blessing into your life if you will entrust those difficult people to God and allow Him to work on your behalf. You just might be the instrument He chooses to use to bring healing, faith, mercy and love into their lives and ultimately a TRUE knowledge of God.

I pray God’s very best for you and your family this Thanksgiving!

Never Give Up

About twelve years ago, I went through my first real faith test as a Christian. Sure, I had been through difficult times before, but this was one that shook the very foundation of my belief system. I grew up in a Christian home. I knew all the right bible verses and new all the stories everyone in church has grown to love! I could argue with the best of the bible scholars, defending my Christian faith with little tolerance for someone else’s perspective. Do you get the sense I was pretty self righteous and proud!

It was my freshman year of college and I wanted to take the large state university for Jesus. I quickly got involved in a Christian organization that helped equip students on how to share their faith boldly and effectively. I saw these students had a real zeal for God and I wanted what they had! They seemed to be unaffected by what people thought of them and they were not embarrassed to share their faith with others. I, on the other hand, was a “Closet Christian”. I didn’t want others to know that I was a follower of Jesus because I was embarrassed of what others might think if they really knew where I stood on God, religion, and a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. On one hand, I loved God, but on another was weak, passive and struggled in so many areas of my life. On top of that, I was blind to all of it.

One night I prayed to God with a sincere heart, “God I want to KNOW YOU and I don’t understand your GRACE completely.” Little did I know, my pray would lead me down a faith filled journey that would forever change the course of my life! After I prayed, I went to sleep. I awoke in the middle of the night and these thoughts entered my mind for the first time ever. “How do you know your God is real? How do you know that the Bible is true?” These nagging thoughts would not leave me. I had never questioned the validity of the Bible, God or Christianity before and it really put fear in my heart for the first time ever. I no longer wanted to believe this stuff just because someone told me it was true, but I wanted to know why I existed and if there really was a God. If God was real, then, was He the God of the Bible or some other religion. I wanted to know if God loved me and could accept me as I was. After all, I didn’t like who I was! Well, these thoughts plagued me night and day for weeks and weeks. I no longer wanted to socialize, or do well in school. Everything I thought was so important all of a sudden wasn’t anymore. My brother even started getting concerned. I talked with lots of friends about this, but they quoted scriptures at me and could not give me solid answers. I turned to my pastor and he looked baffled at what was happening to me. It scared me even more. I sank into depression. I only wanted to sleep my problem away, hoping when I awoke it would be gone or things would be back the way they used to be before I prayed that prayer.

To make matters worse, I already applied to go on a mission trip to share my “Strong Immoveable” faith. Not only was I scared, but I was so confused. I cried out to God and asked for Him to speak to me and show me who he was…nothing but silence. I thought about other religions and even atheism. In the depth of my despair, thoughts of suicide entered my mind. “If God really loved you, He wouldn’t allow you to go through this…would He? Just end your life! For the first time, I realized those thoughts in my mind were not my thoughts. Something had access to my mind other than me and did not want me to find out who God was! All my options were up. I turned to everything I could think of to help me through what I was facing without success. I turned to friends, pastors, my own intellect, reasoning of the mind and my parents. No one could make these thoughts flee. In absolute humility and a broken and contrite heart, I cried out to God and said, “Jesus, I believe you are God and that the Bible is real. I believe you died for my sins and want a real relationship with me. I am questioning everything and I just don’t know anymore if you are real or relevant for my life. Please help me!” (God knows at what point we can’t take the trial any longer and is willing to step in and help.) Deep on the inside of my heart, I heard a still small voice speak to me and He said, “Cory the battle you are going through in your mind belongs to me. I love you. Do not be afraid.”

This voice cut through all the confusion and cloudiness of my mind and gave me such peace and hope. I knew that I knew that God had spoken to me. All of a sudden, memory verses I had memorized when I was younger came flooding into my heart and it was like God was encouraging me to trust him by faith just as Abraham did when he heard God speak to him. The God of the Bible is ALIVE!

I ended up going on the mission trip with an eagerness to learn more about my Savior and God. My doubt and questions did not end with this experience, but I knew that God was real and I was compelled to know Him deeper. One day while on this trip, I was reading and came across a passage that jumped off the pages at me.

John 15:1-2 “I am the true vine, and my Father is the gardener. He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful.” (NIV)

I had wondered why God would allow me to go through such a difficult season. This verse spoke to me so clearly. I had placed so many things before my relationship with God: friends, family, career, insecurities to name a few. God was letting me know He took me through this difficult season to expose things I placed before Him. When I realized those things couldn’t offer me the hope and assurance I was looking for, I sought after God like I had never done before! God was cutting areas out of my life that were hindering my relationship with Him.

The Bible says in Jeremiah 29:13, you will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.
God brought me to a place where I really sought Him out with everything I was. I no longer looked for Him half heartedly or looked to other things to provide my comfort and security.

During this trip, I was spending time in prayer and the Holy Spirit said to me, “You have finally given me the throne of your life” Up until this difficult season, I looked at God as my Savior, but not my Lord. He wants to lead and guide us and direct our steps down a path that will bring great reward into our lives. The problem comes in when we want to lead our own lives and do things our own way! For many years I did this and I was frustrated and defeated. When I finally let go of the stirring wheel and allowed God to have complete control, I realized my life took a turn for the best.

The Bible says in John 16:7, However, I am telling you nothing but the truth when I say it is profitable (good, expedient, advantageous) for you that I go away. Because if I do not go away, the Comforter (Counselor, Helper, Advocate, Intercessor, Strengthener, Standby) will not come to you [into close fellowship with you]; but if I go away, I will send Him to you [to be in close fellowship with you]. (Amp)

God sent the Holy Spirit to help us in our time of need and to guide us into Truth. He is there to teach us the things of God and help us all along the journey of life. Looking back, I am so grateful for the experience I went through because it helped me see God and life in a whole new light.

You might be going through a similar experience. God seems distant and you are going through one of the roughest seasons ever. I want to encourage you that God is there with you through the storm. He will guide and direct you to a safe place and grow you to be more mature in the process. It will be scary and uncomfortable, but the Prince of Peace will guide you. Trust Him by faith and lean on Him in this time. He has your best interest at heart and in time you will see…only Never Give Up!

Mercy Triumphs Over Judgment

I grew up in Church.  I spent my entire life learning about God and what I thought He required of me as a follower.  I became an expert at following rules and regulations and found myself comparing the way I conducted my life to that of others.  As long as my morality exceeded the people in my sphere of influence, I believed I was in good standing with God and I experienced a sense of self-righteousness from it.  At the same time, I knew deep down in my heart I was not perfect and I needed a Savior.  I wanted to do what was right, but found myself making mistakes more often than I would have liked to admit.  I had all these highs and lows based off my moral performance.  When I did the right thing, I believed I was doing well and God was pleased with me and when I did the wrong thing, I had a cloud of condemnation hovering over me for days and weeks at a time.  In an effort to regain acceptance by God and others, I would pray and read my bible more and I would try really hard to earn God’s favor back.  The harder I tried the messier my life seemed to get…Frustrating! 

I struggled with lustful thoughts for years which would lead to an outlet of masturbation.  I felt so condemned every time I gave into this bad habit, but found myself repeating it over and over again.  When I went for periods of time without succumbing to my lustful pleasures, I felt a sense of accomplishment and God was definitely pleased with my effort.  When I messed up, I believed God was angry with me and looked for ways to punish me.  I asked for forgiveness a hundred times and never really believed I was forgiven!!  I didn’t know what was wrong with me, but I knew something needed to change in my life. 

With a heart felt prayer, I asked God to help me through this trial.  The Holy Spirit began to show me several verses in the bible that began the healing process of wrong thinking. 

Ephesians 2:8-9   For it is by free grace (God's unmerited favor) that you are saved (delivered from judgment and made partakers of Christ's salvation) through [your] faith. And this [salvation] is not of yourselves [of your own doing, it came not through your own striving], but it is the gift of God;

Not because of works [not the fulfillment of the Law's demands], lest any man should boast. [It is not the result of what anyone can possibly do, so no one can pride himself in it or take glory to himself.]  (Amplified)

My Christianity was based off of performance or trying, which really meant I was not trusting Jesus Christ’s finished work on the cross!  I can never earn or deserve God’s grace, forgiveness, right standing and unmerited favor on the basis of my good deeds!   When I finally realized I was treating my relationship with God like this, I asked Him to forgive me and I understood a deep truth about God for the first time.  He LOVED and ACCEPTED me the way I was.  Simply by BELIEVING what He did on the Cross 2000 years ago I was totally FORGIVEN!  
  

Galatians 2:16  Yet we know that a man is justified or reckoned righteous and in right standing with God not by works of the Law, but [only] through faith and [absolute] reliance on and adherence to and trust in Jesus Christ (the Messiah, the Anointed One). [Therefore] even we [ourselves] have believed on Christ Jesus, in order to be justified by faith in Christ and not by works of the Law [for we cannot be justified by any observance of the ritual of the Law given by Moses], because by keeping legal rituals and by works no human being can ever be justified (declared righteous and put in right standing with God).

Many Christians have become experts in trying instead of BELIEVING God at His Word.  We try so hard to earn his forgiveness or approval and it has already been done for us.  We simply have to receive it by faith…BELIEVE.  This was not an easy thing for me.  My logical mind wanted to earn and strive for the things of God, but it left me frustrated and defeated.  When I began to let go of trying to figure it all out and just receive his unconditional love, acceptance and forgiveness, real change started to take place in my life.  For the first time, I had real peace and joy and a deep sense of God’s pleasure toward me!  I started to look at people differently.  I wasn’t so quick to judge them or their motives because I finally realized that God didn’t do that with me.  When I deserved judgment, He extended His mercy and grace, and it made me want to do the same for others.  My relationships began changing.  Damaged relationships were restored because I started allowing others to make mistakes and not hold them “accountable” for their failures!   I showed mercy because I experienced the tangible mercy of God in my own life.

God showed me another scripture that was life changing.

 

Romans: 7:19-20   For I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing.  Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it.  So I find this law at work: Although I want to do good, evil is right there with me.  For in my inner being I delight in God’s law; but I see another law at work in me, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within me.  What a wretched man I am!  Who will rescue me from this body that is subject to death?  Thanks be to God, who delivers me through Jesus Christ our Lord!

Romans: 8:1   Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit who gives life has set you free from the law of sin and death. 

The Apostle Paul was writing to the Romans and understood his trust and acceptance were found in Jesus Christ alone and not his ability to keep a bunch of rules and regulations.  Jesus Christ set us free from having to live up to a law we could never keep. 

God didn’t expect me to live this life perfectly, but to trust Him to complete the good work He began in me.  My response was to be open to His leading as He highlighted areas I needed to surrender to Him.  In turn, He would change me little by little. Even when I would make a mistake and start to feel a condemning cloud come over me, I would hear the Holy Spirit whisper to me,

“You are forgiven!  It isn’t by your strength, but by my power that you are set free.  Cory, get back up, dust yourself off, and keep moving in the direction I have for you!”

Wow, God is not the way I thought He was.  As He showed me His true nature, it set me free and helped me begin to change.  He is faithful to complete the good work He began in me, and He can do the same for you!  Don’t be frustrated because you are not as far along the journey as you think you should be.  Rest in God and He will see you through the storms and challenges of this life and use your failures as stepping stones to your destiny.  Remember, your mess can become your ministry!  One day you will look back and be amazed at just how far God has brought you!   Do you have unforgiveness in your heart toward yourself or someone else for unrealistic expectations?  Are you comparing your morality to others and judging them for falling short?  You can be free from that by experiencing God’s unconditional love toward you.  Just receive it by faith!  Ask God to help you receive His love and acceptance and extend it to others who don’t deserve it.  Remember, we don’t deserve it either!    

James 2:13 because judgment without mercy will be shown to anyone who has not been merciful, MERCY TRIUMPHS OVER JUDGMENT.

A Dream From God Takes Commitment

Do you aspire for a more rewarding life? Sure we all do, but are you living it out? One ingredient to living a full life has to do with commitment. In a world of broken promises and empty words the word commitment has lost its true meaning. Today the word has come to mean a very watered down level of dedication. As long as it doesn’t cost a person too much time, energy or pain they might think about being involved or going after a goal or dream. According to Webster’s dictionary the word commitment means the state or instance of being obligated or emotionally impelled, or dedication to a long-term course of action; engagement; involvement. In other words, a person is willing to do whatever it takes to see what is in his heart come to pass.

When I think of a person that is committed, I think of an Olympic athlete. He goes into strict training disciplining his body to eat healthy, and practice hard for an extended amount of time…remember the Olympic Games come around once every four years!! He dedicates the regiment life style for years in hopes of winning a gold metal. I am sure there are days he doesn’t feel like practicing or eating correctly, or getting to sleep on time, but the dream of winning the gold sits before his mind. He is compelled to live out his dreams even if it means sacrificing the pleasures of what others are doing.

Just as the Olympic athlete has the desire to win a great accomplishment in life, God has put something great on the inside of you to work towards. But the only way to achieve the dream God has instilled on the inside of you is to learn to be committed to it. It is so easy to start going after the dream in your heart, but it is quite difficult to finish what you started out to do.

The bible says in Luke 9:62 “No one who puts his hand to the plow, and looks back is fit for service in the Kingdom of God.” 

In this passage, Jesus was challenging a person who up front said: “yes, I will do what it takes to follow you”, but then came up with excuses why he couldn’t fulfill his duty. We all have made excuses at some point in our lives why we shouldn’t continue with a course of action. The key is to overcome those objections with the TRUTH from the Word of God. Take Jesus for example.

Jesus came into the world to seek and save that which was lost. He had a goal in mind, and finished all that God had for Him to do, even though people persecuted him and ultimately tortured him to death. He did it knowing full well the cost involved.

Jesus said in Luke 22:42 “Father, if you are willing, take this cup from me; yet not my will, but yours be done.” 

Jesus was in the Garden of Gethsemanes about to be handed over to the Jewish leaders and Roman soldiers to be beaten and scourged beyond recognition before being nailed to a cross. In His prayer to His Heavenly Father, Jesus said in essence, not the easy route, but let me step up to the plate and fulfill the very reason I was sent to earth. How powerful! Now that is commitment!!

Just as Jesus finished what He started out to do, so you can finish all that God has put in your heart! Seek God about what your next step in life looks like and start living out your God given destiny. When the urge to quit and give up starts to rise up on the inside of you, begin to challenge those negative thoughts with the word of God!! I am more than a conqueror, and I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength. I will not quit until God has released me from my duty. If you feel that you have not been the committed person that God wants you to be, just confess it and ask him to forgive you. He is the God of MANY CHANCES and He ultimately wants you to pass the test. Be committed and fulfill all that God has for you!! It comes with a price, but with hard work, dedication and Trust in God, you can live out the rewarding life He intended for you!