I have a new website! You will be redirected to my brand new blog. Cory Nickols: Are You Throwing A Temper Tantrum?

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Are You Throwing A Temper Tantrum?

I have been without a car for several months and have had to rely on others to take me places. It has been a very humbling experience to say the least, especially since I have had a car for 15 years of my life prior to being without one. Not being able to hang out with friends any time I want, go get a bite to eat or go to the movies on the spur of the moment has been challenging for my flesh to get used to. Just this morning, I got ready for work and my younger brother, who graciously lets me ride to work with him, was not ready at the usual time we leave. In fact, he was sipping coffee at the kitchen table in shorts and a t-shirt – not even close to being ready. My flesh started crawling because I had a lot of work to do today and not getting into the office on time was not a good option. I probed further and I asked him, “Are you ready for work?” At this point, I couldn’t tell if he was or not, but when he sipped his coffee and said, "I haven’t even begun to get ready"...the look on my face said it all…I am not happy with you right now. I knew saying something would not have been good…there would have been nothing good to say, so I glared at him and then looked away. I tried to make him feel bad and manipulate the situation in my favor. I did not need to say anything; my body language said it all! My brother went to get ready and God began to deal with me. He brought to remembrance all the times my brother went out of his way to get me, let me borrow his car, including earlier that morning he let me use it to go play basketball, and on and on it went. Then this scripture came to my mind, “It (LOVE) is not conceited (arrogant and inflated with pride); it is not rude (unmannerly) and does not act unbecomingly. Love (God's love in us) does not insist on its own rights or its own way, for it is not self-seeking; it is not touchy or fretful or resentful; it takes no account of the evil done to it [it pays no attention to a suffered wrong]” (1 Corinthians 13:5 AMP). I was thinking about myself and looking out only for my own interests. I certainly did not care about my younger brother’s plans for the day or even why he slept in. Maybe he stayed out really late for some reason and needed a little extra sleep. His schedule interfered with my plans and I tried to manipulate him by throwing a fit. Of course I did not verbalize it, but I let him know I was not happy with him by my actions and demeanor. How many times do we not get what we want so we throw a fit, get upset or say controlling statements like – “If you don’t do what I want you to do, then I won’t do this for you.” We threaten people just so we can get our way. Can I simply say, that is not LOVE toward our neighbor. I immediately went and apologized and told my brother that I was in the wrong. I went on to explain to him that he is so gracious toward me with his car and I really appreciated all the times he let me borrow it and for the times I inconvenienced him by using it. I needed to relax and trust God because He has a good plan for my day even if I am a few minutes behind…ok… an hour behind my planned schedule! I could have used my energy toward something productive, but instead I wasted it being upset. How different would our relationships be if every time something did not go our way, we gave people some space just to be themselves or make some mistakes? What if we did not try and control them with a temper tantrum, or with verbal threatening remarks? Let’s love people the way we would want to be treated. I know I want to change and continue to go deeper in my love walk toward others. Will you join me? Are you willing to be inconvenienced in order to show grace toward a loved one or neighbor? If you have blown it recently like me, ask God to forgive you, dust yourself off, get back up and allow God to change you. God is full of mercy and He has given us His Holy Spirit to help us along this journey. The next time you feel the urge to get your own way, ask God for wisdom and the strength to respond in a manner that is pleasing to Him.

No comments:

Post a Comment